Cthulhu Dawn
by coffin-fodder
Summary: A Great Old One escapes to Earth and seeks to unearth his old body and begin the Great Clearing Off. And Danny gets to stop him. Joy. Warning, there be language in here. Not extreme enough to warrant an 'M' rating, but extreme enough to give fair warn
1. Chapter 1

There was a table in a place called Rey Vash. A realm where God had imprisoned all the 'false' Gods before him. It was nothing. There was no up, no down, no right, no left. The pretentious bastard even made it so you couldn't move in diagonals. He covered all the bases. A never ending space of white. You could move your legs for as long as you'd like, you wouldn't get anywhere. They were all there. The Egyptian Gods, the Greek Gods, you name it, they were there.

And then there was Cthulhu. He was just unlucky, actually. The only reason God put him there is he was known better than the rest of the pantheon. HE WASN'T EVEN DANGEROUS! Of course, he would never admit that fact, but it was true. The others were far, far worse than him. But, on the flip side of the coin, he was also the luckiest. He was the only one with a physical body that remained on the world. His essence was ripped from the body and it was laid to a comatose like state in R'Lyeh. He woke up once, back in the day, but some fuckwit with a ship rammed him and put an end to that.

He was now sitting at a table speaking to Anubis and Hades about the finer points of followers. Nobody knew where the table came from.

"You need a church to gain power," Anubis was insisting "You have a church, you have followers, and they recruit. More worshippers equal more power"

"Not true." Hades cut in "I didn't have followers and I got on Olympus."

"The only reason you were on Olympus is Zeus is your younger brother" Anubis said

"You're both wrong," Cthulhu shouted cutting them off "My cult is the biggest one out there AND the best at recruiting members."

"Then why are you still here?" Hades asked

"Because, my cult is waiting until the stars are right to free me"

"In other words, they can't find him" Anubis whispered to Hades

"I HEARD THAT, YOU PRETENTIOUS BASTARD!" Cthulhu shouted

He was about to launch into a rant when a strange crackling sound, like someone threw pepper onto a hot stove, came behind them. All three turned at once and saw a swirling blue vortex behind them. All was quiet for a few minutes, until all three of them seemed to realize the same thing at once. It may be a way out. Anubis stood up and took off for the portal, Hades threw his chair at Anubis to stop him, succeeded and ran. Cthulhu jumped off his chair, onto the table, ran across it, jumped off and, using Hades' head as a push off, flung himself through the portal. And they laughed at him when he said he did track. When he made contact with it, it sucked him into a swirling blue tunnel. He looked at the swirling matter around him and saw a light at the end of the tunnel. He hoped that, this time, it really was a light at the end of the tunnel and not an oncoming train.

He took off for the light and entered it.

'Not a train,' he thought 'that's good.'

And he emerged into a small room that had shiny things in it.

'Annnnnd, I'm back to square one' he thought.

He had no idea where he was. Or what he was doing. He looked down and saw that he was nothing more than a mist.

'No body' he thought 'no body means no anchor for my powers. No anchor for my powers means I can't open a wormhole. No wormhole means I can't summon deep space matter to make myself a new body.'

He needed a new body to make a new body. It was a fucking quandary. Cthulhu never did like God's sense of humor. Bastard.

He wished he could still contact his cult. That is…if he even still had a cult. They'd been out of touch for a long, long time. Actually, he realized, even if, by some act of that bastard in the skies, he still had a cult, it'd be a bunch of pimply faced emo teenagers who cut on themselves so much, and lose so much blood, they have trouble lifting the t-shirts they buy at the Good-fuck-will store over their own goddamn heads in the morning, let alone go find a sunken city, get to it, open a crypt, and drag his body out of it.

'Cults just ain't what they used to be' he lamented as he examined the room he was in.

Then it hit him. Like a train. But, he seriously doubted that getting hit by a train would be this helpful in real life. All he needed to do was get enough energy to open a wormhole for the slightest time, pull a quick planet through and then he'd have a body. Sure, it'd be small, but he'd have an anchor and be able to open wormholes. But what could make such an amount of energy. He surveyed the room again. Nothing but a few bright shiny things, a small red box 'C4' and something that was silver and cylindrical that was lying next to a blue print labeled 'nuclear holocaust' written on it.

'DAMNIT!' he mentally shouted 'WHERE CAN I GET A BIG BANG FROM?'

Cthulhu abandoned his efforts in this lab and floated up into the first floor. He surveyed the room and found more of the shiny cylindrical objects all of them having different words on them. 'New York', 'Washington D.C', and 'Camp David' to name a few. Again, nothing that he could use to make an explosion of sufficient size to open a wormhole up. He coasted to the second floor only to find he was in a room surrounded by more of the silver cylinders. Again, nothing that could help him. He coasted to the next floor with the same results. Again and again he rose only to find more and more of the objects. Eventually, even a divine being loses patience and snaps. He focused his energy into a tangible hand, grabbed one of the cylinders and chucked it at the nearest wall, all the while screaming mentally to himself 'WHAT BLOWS UP ON THIS PLANET?'

Seconds later, he had his answer as the dirty bomb he hurled hit the wall, went off and triggered the other bombs in the building, making a glorious display of searing heat, ear shattering noise, and death. But, it was the prettiest damn death anyone has ever seen.

And, for the briefest second a wormhole ripped open. And Cthulhu pulled the smallest bit of cosmic matter through. It was only a few atoms at most, but it was all he needed. The cosmic matter out in the deepest reaches of space was pulled onto him, and his body began to reform. It didn't happen from his feet up, his head down, or his waist and go from there. The effect was instantaneous. The cosmic matter formed into a scaled down form of his body that lie in a deep sleep in R'Lyeh. His cosmic flesh returned and he flexed his newly reformed hands.

"I'm baaaaack" he announced to the magnificently deep crater that was the result of the simultaneous detonation of 45 dirty bombs.

A/N: Okay, I know that it's very likely that nobody here knows what Cthulhu looks like so I point you to the wiki:

http/en. 

I didn't do a description of it because anything I can write won't do Lovecraft's descriptions nearly enough justice. So, read the wiki. And, for the record, scaled down means smaller.


	2. Chapter 2

In the uncountable years that Cthulhu was imprisoned with other divine beings he had forgotten one rather important thing. Human beings are scum. No, scratch that, he liked scum better. Scum had more redeeming value than humans did, too. Scum was generally green or other bright, amusing colors. Humans were generally dark colors. And they all looked the same to him. You think, with millions of years of evolution behind them, they could vary themselves just a bit.

He had wandered across land and ocean alike and he ended up here. Wherever here was, that is. Cthulhu still had no idea where 'here' was. On that note, he had little idea where 'there' was. He cared little about 'anywhere'. His current situation brought back another assessment of annoying human attributes.

Another annoying attribute of humans is that they stare. Every single one of them, they stared at him as he walked down the street, trying to touch them as little as possible. It was like they had never seen a seven foot tall Great Old One before. Some people.

He needed bearings. He needed to know where he was. Not that it'd help. He'd tried to ask them as politely as possible but they just ran away screaming. And they were still staring at him. Goddamn them, he could almost feel their eyes boring into his back.

'Wait a second,' he thought 'there really IS something boring into my back'

He turned and saw three humans dressed in black holding something in their hands that was pointing at him. Occasionally, one of the objects would kick and he would feel that boring sensation. He would look down just in time to see a hole seal itself up. He decided to ignore the strange, strange people and continue walking down the street.

He saw across from him, people going the other way, all staring at him. Maybe they would be so kind as to point him to R'Lyeh. As he was crossing the street he heard a loud noise. He turned and saw two bright objects, attached to what appeared to be a rather solid steel cylinder on wheels coming at him at an incredible speed. He lifted his hand to flick the object away, but it didn't work. Awestruck, he had just enough time to look at his hand in amazement before a bus from the Amity Park Transit Authority hit him.

* * *

The mall was unusually busy on this particular Saturday. Apparently, there was a sale at some department store. But Danny didn't care. He didn't mind that it was overly busy, nor did he care about the fact that Tucker was blithering on about some new techno gadget. It had been slow the past few weeks. The number of Ghosts in Amity Park had steadily declined and had, in recent days, come to a total stop. As if there was something that was stopping the Ghosts from coming to Amity Park. Little did Danny know, the reason that Ghosts had stopped coming to Amity Park was the presence of a Great Old One. This particular Great Old One was Cthulhu, and he was currently picking himself out of the remains of the great steel object that had hit him. From what he gathered from the erratic noises that surrounded him, it was called a 'bus' and it had, apparently, hit him going at something known as '60 M.P.H' on this strange, backwards little planet and he had killed everyone on the bus. He had killed. That meant, in some perverse manner, that he still had it. He was just a bit rusty. He smiled as well a creature with tentacles for a mouth can and continued down the street. Maybe a member of his cult would find their lord and guide him to R'Lyeh. After that incident, he wanted to begin the Great Clearing Off as soon as possible.

Of course, at that moment, there was a member of Cthulhu's Cult walking down the street. She didn't have the stereotypical image that people associated with cults. No long black robe, no evil intent, no sacrificial knife on her belt. No, the knife she carried was dual purpose. Sacrifices AND keeping perverts and the like at bay. It was the 20th century. It was good to multitask. She was considered attractive by most people with green eyes and long red hair, but nothing that really stuck with people. She had zero tolerance for stupid people and she rarely got any action for her annoying trait of withering the manly ego of the quote unquote 'studs' that came onto her.

At this moment, she was on her way home to the house she shared with her brother from the grocery store. She was mentally going over the list of things she had purchased, hoping she hadn't left anything out.

'Milk, eggs, bread…' her thoughts were briefly interrupted by a crowd of people gathered around the wreckage of a bus. She would have stopped to gloat over the pain of others, but the milk was cold and it was a rather hot day.

She continued down the street, checking things off her mental list when she ran into what felt like a rather solid, and sticky, brick wall. She backed off to get a better look and her eyes never could have prepared her for what she saw.

There, standing before her, was Great Cthulhu. It took her mind a moment to process that information. The conversation that her brain had with the rest of her body went something as follows:

FUCK!11! IT'S GREAT CTHULHU! WHAT DO I DO, WHAT DO I DO? INVITE HIM OVER FOR TEA? NO, THAT'S STUPID. GREAT OLD ONES DON'T DRINK TEA. DO GREAT OLD ONES DRINK? NO TIME TO THINK OF IT NOW, YOU NUMBSKULL, THAT'S YOUR GOD YOU JUST RAN INTO!

After all that, the only thing her brain could command her mouth to say was 'Uhhhhhhh'. That was when Cthulhu decided to hazard asking for directions.

"Do you by chance know where R'Lyeh is?" was what he asked in his language. Of course, to a human, it came out something like this "BLASH SPLOOSH GSSSSSSSRGSH R'Lyeh?"

'Damn tentacles,' he thought as he waited for a response from the human.

After several minutes of silence and the same blank stare from the human, Cthulhu began to fear that he broke the human. He turned and began to stride off when he received a response. Apparently, this human was a member of his Cult, as she understood his dialect.

"No, but I can help you find it, Great Cthulhu. If you'd be so gracious as to follow me."

"Lead on" was Cthulhu's response and he followed the human to her home.

"Did you hear about that wreck?" Tucker asked Danny, pulling him out of his daydreaming.

"What wreck?" Sam asked.

"Apparently, a bus ran into something and there was a big wreck."

"What did it run into?" Danny asked.

"The people who saw it say it was something weird. It may have even been a Ghost"

"A GHOST?" Danny almost shouted, drawing the attention of everyone in the food court.

"That's what I heard."

"We gotta go check it out," Danny replied, quiet enough to not have everyone stare at him again.

Danny stood up from the table, ran back into the bathroom, changed into Danny Phantom and flew out onto the surface to investigate the supposed Ghost.

"So…" Tucker began, "Do we follow him, or what?"

"Just go," Sam said, pushing him towards the door.

Danny was on his way to the scene of the accident, when he saw what people were talking about. It was…big. And green. And it looked sticky. And it had, if he wasn't mistaken, tentacles in front of its mouth. And it was following someone.

It certainly was strange, but it was no Ghost. Danny's Ghost breath didn't go off and it didn't have the strange glow that most Ghosts did. But it certainly was strange. And it was certainly following that woman. Thinking he'd be the hero, he flew down towards the thing with intent to deliver a punch. He made himself invisible, as he was certain the creature didn't know of his presence, to keep the element of surprise.

As Danny approached, the beast's arm lashed out and grabbed his forearm. It soon became apparent that the element of surprise, or any other element, for that matter, was obsolete as the creature slammed Danny into a brick apartment wall and knocked him out in a single strike.

Cthulhu looked down at the creature that was foolish enough to attack him. He had snow white hair and was dressed in a ridiculous black spandex suit that gave black a bad name.

"Who is this human?" Cthulhu questioned.

"Nobody is sure, Great Cthulhu, but he apparently fights off Ghosts that periodically appear."

"Ghosts, you say?"

"Yes, Great Cthulhu."

"Hm, there is something unique about this one. Leave him."

Cthulhu and Isis continued on their route to Isis' home outside of town where, hopefully, Cthulhu would be able to awaken his powers in this new body. And find something to wear. As the shock of meeting her God wore off, Isis realized a very pressing fact. Cthulhu wasn't clothed. Not that there was anything to see. They had no need for sexual organs, it was for security. A nice, old fashioned black hooded cloak could hide his face from people. And, it was Isis' most sincere hope, restore the good name of black clothing that the Ghost boy had ruined.

* * *

Okay, I got canon characters worked in there a bit. The thing is, it's just too damn much fun writing things from the perspective of Cthulhu. Oh well, hopefully over the course of the next few chapters I can work some canon characters in. Hopefully. Oh, by the by, the link to the wiki on Cthulhu is in my profile. It didn't show up in the last chapter, for some reason.

P.S I know I was a bit wonky with the capitalization of the word 'Ghost' in that chapter, but I can't recall ever seeing it in the show. So, I changed my mind on the fly and if I missed any, I apologize.

P.P.S Rating changed from T to M for language.


End file.
